Synergistic Connections...

Lisa Rosetta (SL Tribune) once wrote a story (front page) about "Living with HIV" where I stated I was scared of living with the virus because of the costs...

Where am I now... I'm 32, single... work hard, play hard. In 2002 I joined the US Army to fulfill two dreams; one, medical school, two, my dad never had a son and I wanted to carry on his tradition of military service. While at Basic Training, I was raped… I contracted HIV. Life changed that day. I changed; I decided to join the ranks of the “prevention squad” instead of wallowing in self pity, left the military… became a volunteer through the Utah AIDS Foundation and still to this day, volunteer regularly as a prevention counselor. I work hard, volunteer when I’m not at work and play when I have some extra free time.

January 16th I got a phone call from a friend. Her teenage daughter had a child a few years ago and unfortunately has become unable to mentally/physically care for the child. I have been part of the child’s life regularly since birth and in a ten minute phone call was asked to adopt the child, we will call her Reagan. I said yes. Current plan – pick her up Friday, January 20th and keep her for the weekend, a test drive per say.

Fast forward, (Well, rewind) to Friday morning 6:54 AM I came to a stop behind a car as we waited for the Trax (Light Rail) to pass when I was struck from behind by a car traveling approximately 40 MPH, the force of the collision pushed me into the car in front of me, pushing that car into the TRAX line crossing guard arm. I was confused, bumped and bruised… the poor woman who hit me had two children in the back seat, she apologized over and over. “I’m sorry, my baby was crying, the phone was ringing, I wasn’t paying attention.”

So… you ask, Why am I here? What’s my story? Well, I’m here because I have found myself in quite the predicament and don’t know what to do, I guess this is me, reaching out for help… I owe about $6,000.00 on my car. I am current and in good standing on my loan. Problem – Car is only worth about $4,000.00. I am going to be without a vehicle with a loan to pay off and it wasn’t my fault. I work, working means making money, making anything more than $400.00 a month means no assistance… so I fall between the cracks of poor and working poor. My medications currently cost $518.20 a month (with insurance), plus medical appointments that are about $250.00 a month. Most people ask if I’m ever frustrated with having to pay so much for prescriptions and medical, most days I say, “Yeah, sure I am, but it is what it is.” I do what I can, I make ends meet, I volunteer, and I attend a support group for HIV positive women. I drive a woman who is disabled so that she may attend… and now, I am without a vehicle and soon to be with a child… bad timing on the car accident, even tougher timing for life without a car.

I have a blog that shares my story (http://www.h1vpos1t1ve.blogspot.com/) … I try not to complain. I’m usually the strong one, but this one is breaking me.

So I write a letter to the president because it makes me feel better... I know he's not listening, but maybe someone will.

"Dear Mr. President,

I don't know why I think writing the President is going to help me. At one point I tried to become a member of his military force. I was willing to fight for the rights of the nation when my rights were violated and I was raped during Basic Training (2002) and contracted HIV. It changed my life. My current prescription costs are $518.20 a month. Medical Bills are stacking up, ongoing monthly medical costs in addition to prescriptions are close to $250.00 a month. I can barely afford to put food on my table because my paychecks are being garnished to pay for medical bills that I can't stop obtaining. The rape was out of my control, the illness is out of my control and the ability to pay my bills is becoming out of my control...

Pharmaceutical companies and immoral health care billing practices are raping me of the only thing I have... living and providing a life for myself.

I didn't ask for HIV, I didn't ask for these costs... The man who raped me is more than likely on some sort of government assistance that my tax dollars pay.

I was in an accident of no fault of my own on Friday, January 20th that totaled my car. I can't even afford to buy a new car... I don't qualify for assistance programs. I am working, paying taxes, volunteering for a government who doesn't know that I even exist...

I am the American who went to college, works hard, volunteers within the community, but is losing the battle, because I can't afford to win it.

What do I do Mr. President, what do I do?

Amanda J. Brown"

Why do I post this here... because your music helps me get through each and every day... Today, I asked my boss, "Can I have a CD to make a music playlist for my rental car?" What's on that playlist... Dear Mr. President, f***ing Perfect... Pink.

Thank you.